So you’re probably asking yourself, “Andy, why would you leave us for 5 months, and then return with a topic like this?” Well Blog readers, I’m back, and it took a topic like this to get the juices flowing.  While I’ll start back with observations of my daughters crazy antics in future posts, I figured I’d rant about the Baby clothing store phenomenon first because I’ve spent more time at these stores in the last two weekends than I’d like to admit.

Now I want to start off with my appreciation for adorable clothing, whether animal themed or not.  Some of this stuff is ridiculously cute especially when you dress your child up without their consent.  “Well mom and dad, I really didn’t want to wear this pumpkin hat and “I’ve got my daddy under my spell” Halloween outfit, but I have no control over most of my bodily functions so I guess I’ll just deal with it.  Oh, and I just pooped so have fun cleaning that out.”

But as you begin to spend over an hour in one of these stores, you begin to hear a common comment that at first seems natural, but soon becomes like a dagger in the clock on your back reminding you that you’re about to be there another 5 minutes while you talk about how cute it really is.  Here is my theory, you can literally lift up every outfit or item in a store, and say “Isn’t this adorable?”  In truth people, there are not Uncute baby clothes.  It may not be everyones style, but this isn’t the fugly store and they don’t have 6 major corporations built on the fact that something isn’t a “need to have” item.  Every piece of headwear, footwear and clothing is made to melt your heart, and will even cause dad’s to ask the question “Honey, can we get one of these?” while holding up two different hats shaped like animal heads.

And is buying all this stuff worth it?  Damn right it is.  Your kid is worth it, and if you don’t think so, I’m sure there is a grandparent, aunt or uncle that thinks it is. So while my daughter receives clothes that may only fit her a week, I look to clean out my closet and ask questions like “2004 Homecoming sweatshirt? oh how I’ve missed you…”  For any new parents out there, I’ll give you this little bit of advise about the places that we’ve visited recently to hopefully guide you in the right direction :

1.) Baby Gap – It is located in Gap for Kids, and unless you REALLY want to take out a new credit card for each clothing season, make your trips minimal to this location.  The stuff is ridiculous.  It had my wife saying “I wish they had this in adult sizes.” more than once. Here’s the trick, it’s still adult sized pricing.

2.) Children’s Place/Gymboree/New place at Chesterfield Mall – These places have permanent sales racks.  Don’t be ashamed to go through them, one place had a wall of $1.99 items.  But don’t be fooled by the “Buy this and get the next one half off” pricing.  You don’t need two of some items…….

3.) Outlet Mall shopping. – Holy crap.  If you like overwhelming holiday shopping any day of the year, step into Outlet malls for baby clothes.  I’m pretty sure the pricing in the same as normal stores, but where else can you find themed clothing for every holiday of the year in one location.  Who knew that Rosh Hashanah had a mascot.

So that is all I have time for today, but per my lovely wife’s encouragement, I’ve decided to start this back up again.  And guess what, we have 5 months of material to catch up on.  My little princess turns five months this weekend after 2 days of Daddy Daycare over the holiday.  So get ready for some sarcasm, selective hearing and sentiment…..and take the following picture for what you will, it came up when searching for Jewish baby clothing for my joke above and I couldn’t leave it out.